Screw up!

Have you ever done something, that afterwards, gets you thinking,
"What in the world was I thinking or doing?"
 Well, I will not get into too much details, and just say that, as a buddy of mine has told
me repeatedly, I tend to go from 0 to 100 in regards to my trying to build up one.
And, funny thing, is that, its very true, and I just did something a few weeks back, in which the outcome could have been a big nasty, negative outcome, or at least I thought.
   To my surprise and shock, the outcome, was not as bad, as expected and it even left room for me to hope, even a tad bit, that, finally, I have found one single man, whom has
shown some interest in getting to know me more, than he already does, and under the circumstances, he and I met, ended putting the both of us, under his home....I was his tenant, if it had not been for that proximity, we were sort of put under, without either really, expecting anything to come out of it; well, turns out, more came out of it, mainly from my end, yet he has said, he is willing to give me a chance, he has given no one else, because what he already knows about me, and has seen of my character and person, has caught him off guard and he likes it.
    Now, my screwup came sort of after a conversation we held about where he stands, andwhere I stand, and what to look forward to or not, in which he opened up a tad bit more, in sharing the pain he has harbored in his heart, after his own divorce.  I just wish, I could open his heart and rid him of all pain and hurt, but that is impossible for me to do, but something God can do.
  So, in the end, a few weeks after I came out of my box, i started second guessing my intentions and my words towards him and my insecurities popped up and i started sounding more like a whining, baby,  and I started allowing all that negative stuff come out of me, and I ended nagging him and crying to him in an indirect way, which he ignored, and then hence his approach, made me think he was mad and upset at me, but how can a man become upset, when a woman, has given him encouraging words and possitve compliments of his own person, in order to help him see, just how valuable he is, in spite of his own screwups?
  Yet, as my buddy said, " I get hung up on my emotions too fast..."
I wonder if my buddy, can truly see the condition of my heart...anyways...I am unsure how to proceed and only hope that when I see him this week, I do not end up screwing up some more.....ugh....