Here we were sitting inside the gym, waiting for our guests to arrive;
mainly silence overcame from time to time, which would be interrupted by the occasional voice
of a very frustrated 10 almost 11 yr old girl. " At what time is everyone supposed to come, Mom?";"Where are they?"
To which I would say, " I am not sure, and they were supposed to be by 4:30pm....or 5pmish..." I refused to look into her eyes, in order to not see the pain, that was so visible; what to do, when after inviting those you thought would come out, did not because they had other things to do, or had totally forgotten about the invitation, or simply did not care about it. I did my best to hold myself together. We had plenty of food to feed anyone that came through that door, after an hour and a half later and many requests to just pack everything and go home, my baby girl finally came and told me," At least I have you here, Mom. So lets eat."
We got a piece of cake and drink and sat down. I looked at her, and then like a fountain it all came out. I just broke down and cried and said," I'm sorry baby. I am so sorry." To which my now 11 yr old baby girl, got up and wrapped her arms around me, and held me and said," Its ok Mom, you tried."
Just as she was comforting me, alas, what did I see coming through that door, two people?
Why, yes indeed, my best friend and another friend, both walked in and saw that terrible scene and rushed over to comfort the both of us, and persuaded us to stay a bit longer, so we did.
Today, everyone kept on asking," How was the party?" : I just wanted to yell," Why do you care??? Why do you even care!!!!!"
I punched a friend of mine i his tummy, to vent. I tried figuring out what did I do wrong?
Yet, my daughter at least appreciated my efforts and was just glad that she and i were together for her birthday.
and now to continue looking for a new home.
Angel 4 Eternity
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